Game Two - Minnesota at Cleveland

Jacobs Field AKA "Progressive Field" -- Cleveland, Ohio

The game was pretty forgettable -- a 12-2 win by the Indians over the Twins -- but the rest of the night was eventful, ending with a belligerent L throwing water on me (A) and telling all of us that he was "just fine, thank you."

After the blowout, we headed out to the bars and met up with L's cousin & her husband, out on a free pass with the babysitter taking care of the little ones. They were hungry for an adult night out, so we did it up pretty well. We went to the Clevelander, the Boneyard (where they have free peanuts that you could toss on the floor, or at each other) and finished the night at Panini's.

Panini's was the highlight. We got there about 11:30 p.m. They make these disgustingly decadent sandwiches, which are basically everything bad for you put in between two thick slices of bread. They have spicy ham, cole slaw, a fried egg, cheese, all topped with French fries that the "chef" smashes in there with his spatula. The spatula likely hadn't been cleaned for at least a decade.

I'm writing this from the car (C's Jetta), where E is driving like an asshole (L adds, "As usual."). He just got air over train tracks. Our usual refrain, "Ah, it's a rental." It's most certainly not a rental. It's C's lease. BTW, if any Volkswagen officials out there want to sponsor our next Ballpark Tour, we're seeking bids for 2009.

The game was a blowout from early on. The Indians scored five runs in the bottom of the third to make it 6-0, then scored in each of the next four innings to run away with it. Some rookie for the Twins (Macri) hit his first home run of the season to make it 6-1, but the Twinkies never had a chance. Livan Hernandez was on the mound for Minny, and he got shelled. Straight, slow fastballs do not usually fool major league hitters (or minor league hitters, or Little Leaguers).

As you probably read earlier, L was lucky enough -- or had a big enough elbow into the back of the old man sitting a row ahead of us -- to catch a foul ball off the bat of Ryan Garko. I'll post the pic later.

C just reminded me of one of the crazier things that happened last night. Early on in the night, at Clevelander's, some drunk girl thought she could jump the three-foot fence separating Clevelander's patio from the sidewalk. Well, thought she could. She bit it, hitting chin-first. From eyewitness accounts -- yeah, we asked -- the girl actually lost a few teeth and literally had a piece of her chin HANGING OFF. Apparently, it was nasty. We could see blood everywhere from where we were sitting, just inside the door to the bar. After we walked out, somebody from the bar had washed all the blood down with water, so we didn't get to see it.

So, back to Panini's. C was fortunate enough to meet a young lady from Ohio. A recent college graduate, Jessie was a huge Indians fan and was looking for a job in human resources. She graduated from the University of Toledo and was waiting for her friend to finish having a crying argument with her boyfriend, so C invited her to sit at our table and while away the time. As C puts it, his conversational skills start at, "Hey, how's it going," and end with, "Alright, take care." in between is a lot of silence. Instead, E carried much of the conversation. Jessie lamented the fact that now she was out of college, she had to pay her own bills. "Real life sucks," she said.

Earlier in the day, we had lunch at Smokey Bones, a local barbeque place (just before we went and spent ridiculous amounts of money on "souvenirs" from Dick's Sporting Goods and a few other places in the mall). My taste buds thought the bbq was awesome, but unfortunately my stomach didn't agree, so I spent the rest of the day farting my brains out. That's until the contents turned liquid, then I spent about 30 minutes in the bathroom at the Winking Lizard bar before the game ridding myself of said contents. I also started taking shots of Imodium straight from the bottle. Good times.

Anyway, like I said, I'm writing this from the car, so hopefully we'll find an internet connection sooner rather than later so I can post this thing. I'll put up some pics with this, but it takes forever to load the 70-some pics we took last night, so I might just add a few now and the rest later.